not your normal leo

2003-05-15T14:56:00.000-07:00

Well, what do you know - here I sit -big smile on my face - blogging to you live from the big ATL. Wow! Home again at last. Good folks, fine friends and from what I can tell....prime srping weather with a couple of scattered showers (oh, how I've missed the rain).

2003-03-03T11:47:00.000-08:00

After a much needed hiatus from writing daily mental thoughts of note, I come back - - -and hopefully in full force. For about a month be prepared to have this blog read as an "emotional tampon"...cause I'm about to bleed all over it...and pray to greater power that something with substance is here to soak it up.

EXPECTATIONS 101:
To think that I'm sitting here at work, emotionally numb to everything that surrounds me, should be no new feeling after the recent events that coincide with a not-so-civil detachment of someone you had high hopes of spending your life with. But when you fail to approach a relationship without any expectations, your bound to find yourself very unhappy after the continual let down (or as you see it, should be) of that person's expected potential. NOTE TO SELF #1: must always remember - no expectations=not let downs.

PERCEPTION vs. REALITY:
The perception that one can talk about how they want things to be different/change are one thing. But the reality of their actions negate any verbal promise to themselves (and their supportive other half) for a better standard "code of conduct" in a relationship.
Perception, is that strong communication is integral to a successful relationship. Reality, is that strong communication is integral to the success of a relationship.

"the best way to get over one man, is get under another"
B.F.B. - 2000

2003-02-14T23:02:00.000-08:00

Well it's been well over a month and the fans are beignning to stalk me for more material. Sorry for the delay, but you know how times can get when spending your time with nothing more than "tripped the light fantastic" in your palm and that "field of drems" burnedby a recent forrest fire.

At last time of blog-excerpt I was swallowed in the midst of SuperBowl madness ans in the mighty grips of stress itself..alas, there's drugs for that. Right? Maybe and maybe not.....but you put yourself inmy shoes and see how asy it is.

And then my next saga continues....North and the South - the trilogy.

I did decide after the inspiration for you that a book would probably be in line. "Two Blocks Off Normal - a parody of sketch". Much to my chagrin the other possible titl for my book" Trailerpark Debutante, you are not!" has already been published. Miracles never cease!

Next Subject: Safe space travel
When does the learning curve plateau NASA?

Worthy notes of tunage:
Paris Lounge - 2 CD set
Space (club in Ibiza) - Summer 2002 - DJ Reche and Seb Fontaine
Hotel Costes Volume 2 and 3
Seb Fontaine - Live in Ibiza - produced by Radio 1 - London

Deep Dish - Live at Renaissance, Ibiza - produced by Radio 1 - London

2003-01-06T10:33:00.000-08:00

Well, Hell!
The new Year has come and gone without much hype, self-abuse, drug abuse, spousal abuse or sympathy. Damn,.... kinda glad I almost slept through it all.

On the up and up ( I am). Today we make decisions as to whether we pull-out (not a method of birth control) or forge through some last minute Super Bowl Bullshit -- which is exactly what it is. Low grade minority goes NFL party promoter will just NOT wash with me sistah. So, you best be gettin' ya "benjamins" in line for me or else there's a blank stage for your *%#$@ ass! I feel as though I'm gravitating to be more like you.

I'm going to have but ONE MORE cup of coffee. Should this not due the trick, I'm leaving work and going back to bed.

2002-12-13T18:39:00.000-08:00

blogger.com

2002-12-13T18:36:00.000-08:00

one word.com

Imagine my surprise while I peruse through a gay rag (entitled, nonetheless - CYBERSOCKET) only for my bloodshot eyes to rest on an Atlantan blogger....these fags! I tell ya. Nevah evah suprise me....

...let m get a "shout-out" to my peeps in the homeland, cause I know that's where you are.....like the back of my callused left hand.

2002-12-10T14:29:00.000-08:00

Wow - just to think if I'd procrastinated just two more days in blogging I could have reached an all time blog hiatus of a full month. Geez, mistah!

The weekend was one filled with questions simliar, but not limited to, "what do we now", "so, you bored?", "um...do you wanna get out and just ride around?", "whatcha wanna do today?". I'm here to testify to you folks that Rilla and I were a bored couple of gay homosexuals this weekend (aside from our need to hear Miss Q-Liquor's daily affirmation). No drugs, no cares and definitely no agenda - either hidden or obvious. We did, however, score a great tree over at Albertsons in North Park (transitional gayborhood #1) - proceeded to take it home, wrestle with last years tree stand through an entire bottle of Petite Syrah, venture to Rite-Aid (with said tree hanging over third story rail - -as to balance it) buy new stand (and bottle of wine), drill hole in trunk (as any good boy scout would know) and "fix it" so that it would stand completely straight in it's stand. Which it did - only becuase I invested in (yet another) state of the art (patent pending) self-correcting (as if) tree stand. Yeah baby!
Not until Monday did we break out the ornaments. Neighbor came over (with bottle of Petite Syrah in hand - -we had been wine shopping at the same time the other night, FYI) and we slung some cheer around our crib. Of course the ficus underplanted with maiden hair fern (which blocked folks from seeing directly into our unit) had to be placed somewhere else in the complex - - that was issue #1. Soon be solved by it's new and improved re-location to the elevator landing on floor #3 - for maximum winter light exposure, ya'll -- those bithces are finicky things, trust...................
..........oh yeah, back to the decorating. Well, it was fun - Andrew was trying to pair up some "fierce" (can ornaments be that?) fuscia metallic globes with silver polka-dots as ear bobs. Since he was going to "drag"on the Christmas spirit coming soon. NICE - I only thought you and you did that sort of things to holiday icons related to religious holiday, Easter anyone?

It's 66 degrees and fucking lovely....how you durrin?

2002-11-12T14:25:00.000-08:00

...73 degrees and sunny...
The above little title makes me snicker inside, just knowing that yesterday I was bitching about the rain. Hee Hee. Sucks to live here!

Things that make you go hmmm?: (and yes this is a list!)

- How my co-worker (recovering speed freak) is able to replace her habit with 16 cups of coffee a day and not manage to blink once.
- How my boss can be on the verge of bankruptcy, trade in the Mercedes (good first call) and then purchase a brand new Ford F150.
- Why my boss's wife hair style gets more "butch" by the cut.
- Why above mentioned wife is now having us call her "Nan" rather than Nancy.
- Why my husband spends more time on his orchids than he does on me? Jealous? umm, yeah
- Why are the orchids being held ransom until Shawn gets sufficient attention?

The sounds of Hotel Costes are blaring through the office. I've only indulged in two cigarettes today. I've eaten left-over spaghetti for lunch and now have heartburn (why didn't that happen last night when I ate it the first time). And tonight will be the first night at our new gym. And new gym = new people. And new people mean more possiblities to find people with larger boats and European vacation homes.

-

2002-11-11T11:05:00.000-08:00

rain, rain, go away
well, we have begun the rainy season here in the land of the perma tan and ever so sunny sky. Lasting all of a collective three days, it's just not enough to satisfy my precipitational desires. A, #1, people here have no idea what precipitaion is, much less spell it, much less drive in it. Grrrrrrrrrrrrr. I want thunderstorms dammmmit. Lightning, crazy sex, thunderbolt storms - not this dreary, "I just moved to Seattle"- style drizzly wimpy rain!!!! Geez - what's a guy have to do to get a decent storm these days?

Usually Fall drives me to the ever-so-expanding CD closet (for which I need another rack) and finds me collectively gathering all the Sara McLachland CDs that arent too terribly scratched, and playing them repetively until the walls echo her lyrics. Whereas this Fall is no diferent from any of the rest (Sara is blaring as we speak) - I'm really longing to walk down the streets and hear the leaves rushing past me as I stroll through the neighborhoods. Alas, instead, I find myself (Rilla in tow) on the bikes whizzing through cul de sacs on a 22 mile Sunday bike ride - in 73 dregree weather. What the FUCK? Whereas I'm not complaining - I do think I'm going through some sort of non-menopausal season deprivation here. Hmm - maybe it's time to fly to Nantucket for the weekend!

Saturday night was a calm one (depsite the fact that we have 4 untouched hits of X in the mirrored box), spent with David, watching movies and getting baked. Ah, to order pizza in the rain. I would love to tell you all what we watched (it was hilariously entertaining) but I seem to have forgotten. Imagine

2002-11-06T09:44:00.000-08:00

(my) angel
spend all your time waiting, for that second chance
for a break that would it make it okay.
there's always some reason
to feel no good enough
and it's hard at the end of the day.
i need some distraction, oh a beautiful release.
memories seep from my vein.
and empty oh weightless and maybe,
i'll find some peace tonight.

In the arms of the angel, far away from here,
from this dark cold hotel room
and the endlessness that you feel.
you are pulled for the wreckage
of your silent revelry,
your in the arms of an angel
my you find some comfort here.

so tired of this straight line
where everywhere you turn,
there are vultures and thieves at your back.
the storm keeps on twisting.
keep on building the lies
but you make up for all that you lack.
it don't make no difference,
to escape this one last time,
it's easier to believe.
in this sweet madnesss,
oh this glorious sadness
it brings me to my knees.

In the arms of the angel far away from here,
from this dark cold hotel room
and the endlessness that you feel.
you are pulled for the wreckage
of your silent revelry,
your in the arms of an angel
my you find some comfort here.

- s.mcclachlan.

2002-11-05T10:40:00.000-08:00

on average I drink 2.5 - 3.0 gallons of filtered water a day.....I also pee about an average of 10 times per day....

just another random thought brought to you my a right-brained person.

2002-10-31T10:17:00.000-08:00

Can I just say that store will never be the same.
http://notyournomalleo.blogspot.com

2002-10-31T10:16:00.000-08:00

Training Heels
There's nothing more touching than taking a child to buy his or her first new bicycle. Well, WAIT! There IS REALLY something more that pulls on the heart strings than that. Taking your BF to buy his first dress, heels, wig, nails, and fishnets - sure beats the hell out of any Normal Rockwell scene I've seen painted. Yes, Yes - just when I think I'm about to give up all hope and hang up those hooker heels (like I'm a retired boxer, hanging up his gloves) Rilla throws me a curve ball. After not really having such a great morning, he calls me and asks where our neighbor can purchase plus size footwear. Off the cuff I immediately spew out Pic n' Pay or Payless Shoes and with ease throw out the two nearest locations. WHY IS IT THAT I KNOW THESE THINGS. Long story, short - they end up at Ross (dress for less, whew knew?) Rilla purchases his first set of training heels. I must say the're much trendier than my first. A large substantial heel ( I like to refer to that style as "withcy-poo-pump", a broad satin strap just past the toe area, an ankle strap that actually may work, and smart rhinestone encrusted buckles make for a fierce shoe ensemble.

From there, it was all downhill. We find oursleves at Buffalo Breath Costumes in Old Towne ( with 5,000 other last minute shoppers) looking at go-go suits and french maid outfits - with the rest of San Diego's female populations, mind you. We snag coordinating White and Black super afro wigs and decide then and there, that we must buy the matching fishnets, and not chance on them being sold out if we look elsewhere. THE FUN HAS BEGUN. From there, it's back to Supergaydom (that would be Hillcrest) we hit two vintage stores - the first was a psuedo bomb, but the second was a bang. We will walk in, make no bones about it, and go right for the women's section. Let's see....there's small, medium, and big girl. WE snag dresses and find a dressing room. Almost on cue - we both come out and scream - "It's PERFECT". All the time, not realizing the gaggle of hetero's that we're squeezing themselves into last years pirate maiden costumes amongst us. Well of course they're jaws all drop when we pop out from behind the changing curtain, squeal in delight at how cute the other one looks, and immediatley start giving the other tailoring advice about the June Clever collar "that just MUST go" and how easy it will be to put a hem in that fabric. COMPLETELY IN A WORLD ALL OF OUR OWN.

2002-10-30T10:07:00.000-08:00

Surely I have not found myself on the eve of Day of the Dead with nothing to wear. Sad to say, but it's true. I've got shoes, mind you. Hooker heels at that. But for strange reasons unknown, even to myself, I have little or no desire to don a wig or a stylish new pair of ghetto fishnets. Strange behavior for one that prides himself in innovative "get-ups" and not-so-comfy, yet very controversial costumery. I think I'm depressed.GRRRRRRRRR.

I NEED TO "snap out of it"

Quite possibly a fresh set of nails and "fierce" skirt could do just that.
http://notyournormalleo.blogspot.com

2002-10-22T13:38:00.000-07:00

Tunes of worthy note:
* Thrill Kill Cult - Dirty Little Secrets
* Cassius - (the new one - I don't have the disc sleeve with me)
* Underwater - Episode / double CD (featuring lovely trance tracks and infectious grooves from the creators of Gus Gus)
* Gus Gus - I'm buying it today come hell or highwater (fuck the light bill)

2002-10-22T13:29:00.000-07:00

F.O.R.D.
For many, like myself, we grew up in small rural (aka redneck) communities which forever will fight over whether FORD is better than CHEVY's.....there are always these little acronyms that stick in your head. F.O.R.D. = First On Race Day or Found On Road Dead.
Ahh - simple minds, simple rhymes.

Note to self: Must pick out new primary care physician today for healthcare plan. Double Note: Make sure their Jewish, they always seem to sympathize with pain and anguish, and will prescribe at the drop of a hat.

First day BACK on Welbutrin. I swear I'm going to quit - and be happy and less anxious (better living through chemistry) when I do.

2002-10-10T10:11:00.000-07:00

did mention bongos and a james bond overtone little pank pank, pankitty pank in the above mentioned review?

well, there is...

2002-10-10T09:29:00.000-07:00

melo-d-licious
churning and burning this morning I stumbled across the newly burned copy of The Thrill Kill Cult's latest and greatest, Dirty Little Secrets. YUM! As predicted it's a not-so-hypnotic blend of an oh-so-unusual cornacopia (if you will, being it's fall) of trip-back beats blended with the cubic sounds one might find synonymous with the visual media used in Nazi propaganda posters. Ah....now that's a visual (of the aural) of the genre of the CD. Okay...no more coffee.

2002-10-08T09:42:00.000-07:00

Wet and Wild and in your room
Okay, what's up with sexual dreams involving an old classmate from high school that looked Dusty Rhodes from WWF professional wrestling? Ponder? NOT!

Possible evening engagement with new found friend,Ozzie - and not as in Osbourne. Supposedly he has press tickets to the new Madonna (gasp, squeal) movie screening tonight. D-light, D-groovy, D-yeah! One wonders if this will be a double date, meaning his boyfriend will be in tow or not. This boyfriend of his sure seems "convienient", if you know what I mean. Something a lttle slim shady about that. No skin off my back, that's his "bizness".

The three "F" rule is being re-instated. Unless you're "F"eeding, "F"inancing or "F"ucking me, it's none of your business. Not that any instance has sparked the reinstatement of such relationship standard - -I just like the way it rolls of the tongue before 9:00 am.

Did I mention Madonna screening tickets? I'm appalled by redundancy. But you know, I do adore the color of jealousy on most folks.

2002-09-21T12:40:00.000-07:00

Another Saturday Morning blog? hmmmm....pod person?
I'm sitting here smoking my third cigarette for the morning. It's 12:30pm and I've already completed a home-cooked breakfast, the cleaning of both bathrooms and the third loop of Verve Remixed ( I will wear an album out, then retire it for a month or so). So, my cigarette is well rewarded.

Rilla is passed out cold in the well-made bed, the blinds clatter with the constant breeze, and the decadent aroma of fresh (just this morning) purchased casa blanca lilies, fills the room. I've just put the finishing touches on the first west coast POTluck dinner invites and printed one out for proofing and page alignment. I then will hand deliver them to the appropriate lucky invitees. Yes, a soiree is in tow and in honor for next weekend's guest from Arizona. Since the last blog installation, yet another fun neighbor has landed at our doorstep. Lu Lu (yes, that's short for Luscia) has joined the ever growing compound at the lovely Hillcrest Towers. Boasting from a well-to-do family in the Northeast, a recent Harvard grad, new teacher at SDSU, and F.U.C.K. fun individual, she is the catalyst behind my new social gathering. Just when I think we should move, here comes another bad influence...and then of course.....I sign another years lease.

Work is kicking my ass and I wonder when the end of the mayhem gone madness will simmer down to a peaceful office full of productivity and non-smokers. Good luck to me with both requests. Greece was in the office (three days earlier than orginially planned - - what's up with those greek fuckers) so the early part of the week was, as you can guess..fucking crazy. It's not everyday the IOC comes to your office. And needless to say, for that, I am grateful. Language barriers, strong coffee, blank smiles and bad breath, aren't among my top ten for a monday morning.

I'm in a desperate need to adopt a kitten before 1:30 - so as I can clean the rest of the house and go to the beach without a thought in my head. Stupid anyone? Bueler, Bueler? Which leads me to my first note to self of the weekend. Spend less time blogging about kittens and maybe I could find one faster. Pretty plausible assumption, hugh? meow? buh bye..........

2002-09-12T12:47:00.000-07:00

fleeing to "The left coast"....
Last night was #3. Number three in the succession of east coast fleeing to the left coast via interstate 10.

Dinners with Southern Guests As Follows:
Monday - old friend from Atlanta, now in San Diego with Navy boyfriend. Both 25, too cute, impressionable, in love. Someone pull the spoon from my throat, apathy has not yet been served.
Tueseday - Rilla's 6'5" programming friend from the Atlanta OPTIO crew, here in San Diego on training in La Jolla. Note to self: 6 beers, 2 bottles of cheap merlot, 2 Bass Ales, 3 games of lousy pool and a vodka drink (while we watch "The sweetest thing", for the second time) = showing up at work at 11:15AM SHARP! LOL
Wednesday - old friend from "Alantra" is here on an extended stay on vacation, great time had by all. He's looking to relocate to the left coast asap. Gosh, must be the weather!

Thursday - Rilla and I will have a quiet (thank GOD I can finally say that without the fear of winding up at Backstreet at 4:00 am) evening. Most likely we'll go to Bourbon Street.( I think our wanted posters have finally been taken down, now) Take a spin through the local porn shop (The Crypt, doesn't that name make you just want to beat-off), and call it a night. Drink of the Season - A Long Beach...much like a Long Island, but with a more powerful "puch"...hee hee...I am just full of puns.

2002-09-09T16:47:00.000-07:00

highlight of day:
50 Top Event Planning Companies World Wide
#50 Image Events / Image Events Worldwide - San Diego - Average Revenue for 2002 $6.5 Million*

*Ranked by the special events industry and Special Events Magazine

2002-09-08T11:49:00.000-07:00

Whereas Sunday morning blogs are almost non-existent with me, I feel the need to write. Sanity has been restored to the house, pot has arrived. We thank God for the small miracles and keep praying for the bigger ones (classic 50's acrchitecture nesteled atop helix cliff in Solana Beach).

Much to my shagrin, my evenig of drunken stupor didn't end the tragic way I had envisioned. (Excuse me now while I go and locate another cigarette) Moving furniture at 10:00pm with one of the best tequila buzzes I had swilled in a while was no fun, by no one. Alas, our neighbor now has a complimentary set of cherry furniture and BED (air mattresses must suck, especially after 3 months) delivered by none other than the happy drunken movers - -that would be Rilla and I.

The evening started at Hamburger Mary's (which has to be the loudest place to drink) knocking down "kick-ass margaritas" -- and yes there's reason behind the name, folks. Above mentioned neighbor had a taste for tequila after inhaling sopes at the local mex joint, just across the road. Hours later I find myself losing that "kick-ass" buzz after a toss a mattress and box springs over the second story balcony and into the bed of his pick-up. THIS - is white trash at it's best!!!!!! Above mentioned furniture comes from long time friend of my other half......who happens to be moving out becuase his roommate was swatted down by 20 FBI agents on a couple of counts of extortion (did I spell that right?). There's a story here boys and girls.....If you're dating a Philipino with a 1 inch penis, first...do not take pictures, second.....do not fax them to Philipino's law office faxes demanding reimbursement for said travel to San Diego (should have checked out his goods BEFORE you flew him down here). IDIOT. FAGGOT IDIOT. Oh well, at least now above mentioned neighbor has a lovely four-poster bed and his back will be better because of it.

And what was that MISTER about having a chance to correct the things in your past?

2002-08-29T18:34:00.000-07:00

It's been a pretty interesting 8 days for me. Fresh from Miami (now I know whay I don't miss the south) I'm back in the office and ready to hit the pavment running with all my might and energy.

My apologies for the lack of effort put into blogging, but quite honestly, I haven't had the time, nor the energy even to take a piss break.

By this weekend, my company will cease to exist under it's worldwide title and begin anew as an international facility brinking on virtual chaos. Yep, the east coast portion of IE is buh-bye. I couldn't be more pleased with the decision or it's timing. Having spent far more than my faiar share funneling them info and proposals - I'm eager to see them no more. It's really just awful that one of their people will be becoming one of our people by the end if the first week in September. It Sucks, But welcome to the incestious industry we are in.

Miami rocked! Conference, convention, tradeshow floor, the Lowes -- we were the talk of the town. I hate to pat ourselves on the back but when you know your stuff - you know your stuff and IE shone like a beacon. Having lined up a bevy of "meetings and coffees and dinnners, and after dinner, and breakfasts and after breakfasts and drink meetings" I came home with a list of event producers names that rivalved the Grammy's. With an act of God and a good concierge we pulled all those fluffy "meetings off.

2002-08-15T15:03:00.000-07:00

2002-08-15T14:52:00.000-07:00

Jobyork: I thought you liked it in the face
ShawnRWaters: I'm engrossed in this website that actually let's you post the reviews of escorts that you've slept with and give them RATINGS -- IT's a RIOT!!!!!
ShawnRWaters: http://www.devonsf.com/home.html
Jobyork: you look different in those pics
ShawnRWaters: I swear it's a riot - - I love reading other people's blogs - it's so nice and refreshing
ShawnRWaters: to say the very least
ShawnRWaters: escort? - - what tax bracket does that fall under?
Jobyork: tax bracket or bracelet. ...hey I have to drive up to carlsbad in a few mins to pick up my Sister for dinner..Do you have time for a drink?
ShawnRWaters: Sure! what time and where? I have an Image Events logo Shirt on...do you think they'll let me in to any of those low-class bars you have in mind?

Yep, another busy busy busy BUSY day here in sunny San Diego. If they only knew!

2002-08-15T14:26:00.000-07:00

Yum Daddy Yum....is written all over his face......

2002-08-13T13:39:00.000-07:00

Just when I decide to drop off the planet, low and behold I get the best news of the century, Whereas I've fantasized about living in Greece from the moment I stepped foot in Athens just three short summers ago, I've known it to be a far cry from realistically coming true. Well.........until this morning. As of 8:15 AM pacific standard time Image Events World Wide dissolved all relations with Image East and formed Image Events International...just in time to accept a call from the IOC in Athens Greece to be asked to provide all digital output and related support items for the 2004 Olympic games. The bonus of it all is that Uncle Sam won't get a dime when we set up shop outside the good US of A. To good to be true - -not at all! Our bid has been submitted for months and no word until now. How prophetic, the moment the papers are signed this AM releasing us from our duties as a WORLD WIDE, LLC., the phone rings. I cry, I go to the bathroom - I almost vomit. YES, YES, YES! After 6.5 years in the special events industry - - I finally get a shot at the MACK DADDY event of them all. All the wait has been worth it!

2002-08-12T16:21:00.000-07:00

I'm officially dropping off the face of the earth for a little - when I return, I'll be sure to write.

2002-08-01T12:20:00.000-07:00

Lunch:
One Glazed Donut
One Chocolate Donut
One Bean and Cheese Burrito
One Frozen Snicker's Bar
One Gallon Water
One Camel Light Cigarette
One Rolaids
......................eeeeek. I feel like a finger down my throat would feel better than the above.

2002-08-01T11:27:00.000-07:00

]
Alas, I'm not dead. YET!
Tis the cycle of a party weekend: Fun, Fun, Fun, Recovery, Recovery. Finally, today marks my "head out of the fog" day. Much to my dismay I held up relatively well, considering I broke my all time record for sleep depravation. Which was nothing to be given a trophy for, but still a record. Wouldn't my mother be proud. The weekend held true to my expectations and to the ramblings of others. Very much a quality and quantity crowd...one that a fag like me is proud to be a part of. Of course there is always going to be that tortureous view of badly-bedecked leather clans. And no festival would be complete without a sagging breast flopping from the chest of a true, hardcore feminist (softball coach).

Shiny happy people - would be the label I would stick on this years faggot festival. Heaps of smiles, both given and returned. I love where I live - I'm glad I took the risk of living somewhere new.

2002-07-25T12:30:00.000-07:00

Chicane, Far from the Maddening Crowds

Last night's brain cell's were expended at Flick's. Who can pass up one dollar cocktails and shining new faces, just in for PRIDE. Not us!. After a shot of ambition (tequila) we finished the two loads of whites and donned our best white hanes t-shirts, casual footwear, and headed down the block. Fun was had by all. We ran into Pepe (as in Pepe le Pue) - he used to have a blonde streak down the center of his noggin, now she's done gone platinum on us, so the old nick name is null and void.

Rilla and I managed to pour ourselves out of bed and make it to a client breakfast (chic new bistro in Pacific Beach - which boasts fuckinawsomegreatnibblies. The owner. Wow - B-E-A-U-T-I-F-U-L. So serene, or maybe that was the invoked ambience of the 8 foot tall buddha lounging in the corner (and taking up valuable seating space, mind you). Tamales and scrambled eggs with verde sauce, pesto omlet, coconut crusted cinnamon french toast (with boisonberry coulis), and the most amazing latte ever to touch my lips. YUM YUM YUM - go get you SUM.

I totally chilled on my way into work (that would now be 11:45am) listening to the "siren sounds" of Chicane, passing the little surfer cottages, merging onto the interstate, laughing at the Dr. Suess-esqe Eucalyptus trees and letting all the tranquil thoughts (usually impervious to interupted ADD patterns) just flow. I am in the best space, I've been in quite some time.

Ahhhh, sucks to be me..LOL

2002-07-24T11:26:00.000-07:00

29 and holding.........

Wow, I've made it yet another f*cking year. Who knew?

I just arrived back from a little trip to Del Mar. You know, there are worst places to be confined to traffic. A great temperate breeze gusts through the bronco - all windows, plus the back one are down (it's like a damned wind tunnel), traffic bumper to bumper (it's the opening day of the Del Mar Horsetracks Thoroughbread Racing Season), I sit and wait patiently for the next signal to change to green. I sigh in angst. I wipe the non-existent sweat from my head and turn my head west. Blue skies as far as the eye can see, meet the lipid blue ocean. Crisp white cabanas and canvas umbrellas dot the pristine beach to my right. The breeze turns slightly cooler. I must be feeling the air coming right off the water. A glorious sun overhead warms the coast to a lovely 81 degrees.

Yes, there are worse places to be right now.

2002-07-22T12:26:00.000-07:00

GAY PRIDE or GO HIDE?

It is here, ladies, big GURLZ, and gentlemenz! Gay PRIDE week is upon us, California style.

Okay, so I've always been a bit bored with gay pride in Atlanta. A little let down, and surely not titalated by the overwhelming presence of freaks. A swirl friend and I coined "go hide" in lieu of "gay pride" a new slogan for Atlanta. It's a bit true. Never fails that the preppy young (Brooks Brothers not Abercrombie type) couple fails to nab the attention of the Atlanta news cameras as they seek out the tiwsted, bizarre, and almost always TRANSGENDERED. Not just lesbian and gays anymore - we've suddenly over the past several years felt the need to further disect the gay GENRE, if you will - for futher classification. Next year can we include the BI-POLAR and SEXUALLY MONOTONOUS groups. I feel they are being left out and need a home under our Dewey Decimal System for queers. Cross reference or cross dresser - Parker Posey would surely know.

The week is absolutley packed with events every single night! The arrival of our new roommate on Friday (in the middle of all the madness) insures not only a breath of fresh air about, but also that trouble is just two steps away. Weekend guests from L.A. will hopefully trickle in on Friday or their space automatically goes the next lucky visitor-in-waiting. Must stock up on fruits, bottled water, suncreen and 6-packs of Insure, unsalted nuts, lube, condoms, lube remover and make sure all towels and sheets are clean. The blender will be humming with protien shakes, the oven will be warm from the recent baking of "cookies", the new speakers (now in every room of the apartment) will blaring the new tunes of the latest bootlegged recording of Michael Fierman or Monty Q. Sounds almost like a Christmas story......awwwww....pass me the eGGnoG.

T-parties on the pier. T-parties at the Zoo. T-parties at the Marriott. T-parties in my house. T-parties in my head.

2002-07-19T16:01:00.000-07:00

....it passed

Life is kind of like lameze class( that technique for mother's to be - however you spell it), take a death breath and you'll be amazed at the things you can "pass".

I had a relatively busy day, here at the office, that is. A local arena soccer team is contemplating a retainer for us to handle all of their PR and promotion....this could be fun...... that turns to tragedy. Note to self. With all smiles, (no, really) I delve deep into the project for a Tuesday meeting and visual presentation. Some days I'm lucky to be a homosexual. Throwing together an impactful, yet simple visual presentation, is a snap. 10 minutes + hot glue gun = beauty. The most simple equation for success folks.

On other office notes:
- My cohort, co-worker, and 1/4 non-Christian workmate is about to send me over the fuzzy (and velcro friendly) edge of our shared office cublice.
- The vending machine guy (upon request by me) has started to give us quite a new selection of goodies. There's Ramen noodle cups, a six pack of powdered "Donettes", California trail mix (why not North Dakota trail mix), Power Bars (in a selection of flavors), and ususal run of the mill, sun chips, cheetos, and carbo bullshit. I am happy to report that gummy products are on their way next time around.
- Our new secretary is worse than the last one. How could we have hired another red head after how incompetent the last one was. This one does make copies, I shoudln't bitch. But I've never seen "casual Fridays" outfits like these. Lace-up denim tops. Suki Suki NO!
- 1/4 non-Christrian co-worker leaves early due to child's severe diarrhea at day care. There is a GOD!
- Commission checks are on their way.
- Upon the recent loss of bosses glasses he can no longer aim at me when throwing the glass ashtray. What was that about bad things happening to bad people? And all that time I wondered what that "crunch" was under my unsuspecting feet as I stretched them out under his desk. Hmmm.
- The resurection of my P-Town bumper sticker and it's new position on my fuzzy cubicle wall.
- Smiles on the faces of my co-workers.

2002-07-18T14:08:00.000-07:00

"Karma's a bitch, but you'll find that out for yourself....."

I'm in a completely bad place today. I woke up feeling unwanted by the world, worthless, unaccountable for anything positive and utterly disgusted with the last four years of my life. Where is the pent-up latent negativity coming from? Despite the imaginary cloud hovering over my world, I manage to glance around and see everything BUT a slackard. Accusations on my character by a half-cracked out (and widely hated business owner) have me soul searching for the true me. Whereas these slanderous comments are fabricated by the paranoid mind of seriously f*cked up individual, it still knocks at the door where my insecurities are held. Causing me to second guess my every action. Putting every conversation under a microscope for further review before letting it pass my lips.

This to, shall pass. Tomorrow comes in 18 more hours.

2002-07-11T12:28:00.000-07:00

Book of note:
How To Be A Complete Dandy, by Stephen Robins, PRION BOOKS

Thoughts of note:
GPS: Gay Positioning System AKA fags with cell phones

Music of note:
Cassius - go out and treat yourself, really.

Emotions of note:
Ha HA HA HA - NONE

2002-07-11T10:56:00.000-07:00

Those pearly Gates of opportunity

Excerpts from Bill Gates' speech to Mt. Whitney High School in Visalia California.

Rule #1|: Life is not fair get used to it
Rule #2: The world won't care about your self esteem. The world will expect you to accomplish something BEFORE you feel good about yourself.
Rule #4: If you think your teacher is tough, wait until you get a boss.
Rule #5: Flipping burgers in not beneath your dignity. Your grandparents had different word for burger flipping - they called it opportunity.
Rule #6: If you mess up, it's not your parents fault or anyone elses, so don't whine about your mistakes, learn from them.
Rule #7: Before you were born, your parents weren't as boring as the are now. They got that way from paying your bills, buying your clothes, and listening to you talk about how cool you are. So before you save the rainforest from the parasites of you parents' generation, try delousing the closet in your own room.
Rule #10: Television is NOT real life. In real life people actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs. ( I guess this is a "Friends" TV show reference? )
Rule #11: Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one.

2002-07-09T15:08:00.000-07:00

The week in Review

You know, many folks will beg to differ on the pleasant effects of kind bud. However, I'm a strong campaigner for THC. Pot saves marriages. After a hard day at the office, there's nothing that soothes my soul like a good ole bong hit. Actually nothing makes bumper to bumper traffic seem so pleasant as that long lost roach you find wedged in between the seat and center console. Talk about "good save". But, then again there are those days when one realizes the one hitter is still in the side door pocket of the truck. Ahhhhh! Nightmare client - -buh bye! OR it's the afternoons (few and far between) when the bossman closes the office door and you get a chance to reivew the latest rewarded efforts of that last launch with a good "fattie". Yes, folks.....POT, "the fabric of our lives"

That whole last paragraph WAS going somewhere pertinent BTW. Read on.

Yesterday WAS a "hard day at the office" so YES, I rewarded myself with a big "fattie". I take that back...not a big fattie....it was more like a series of deep breath exercises with my lips perched around an acrylic tubular "vase"......oh yes. We'll call it a vase - in honor B-square's birthday incident. Of course all this happened AFTER the new obsessive compulsive (eater) neighbor finally left our living room. You see, because the weather is so fabulous here and the living community so friendly....we leave the front door wide open.....to encourage the breeze, you know! (At times I do feel like I'm back at the frat house...maybe it's the bong, hmm). AT ANY RATE, he was over thanking Rilla for the rainbow glow stick necklace we put on his door knob. YES, we were a little boozed up when we decided to selectively distribute glow things on neighbors doors..but, nonetheless, festive it WAS. The OC neighbor finally left ater talking about how he "liked bright things" (how profound is that) and that we should "stop by to see his two christmas trees and lights all turned on".....umm hmm. BTW he's jewish, he doesn't know any better.

The night was capped off perusing the aisles of Border's Book store. A stroll down the "self-help" aisle proved fruitless. "Alternative lifestyles" section maybe got a yawn or two, but that's all I gave it. There was a smart little chronicle on 50's and 60's decorative patterns that I eyed over in "Art and Architecture" - not bad. Who knew that all that bad wallpaper of the 70's could be classified under "Pop and Psychedelia".

2002-07-08T11:25:00.000-07:00

Resort Wear
Why and the hell DO they call it "resort wear" - it's more like "last resort" wear. Just a fleeing thought I'd meaning to blog about for a while now. Just a THOUGHT! That's all.

All the troops have safely made it back from the cape, and the stories are beginning to be told. Ahhhhh, how I miss that wonderful, unhinhibted haven of testosterone. Sigh! Anyone game for Labor Day?

Laguna Beach for the 4th, The HOLE on Sunday....ahhh, life is good and summer is in FULL SWING! Gay Pride is 18 days away and little leo's 29th is only 16. I'm saving seratonin now...a rainy day might just be around the bend.

2002-06-27T13:14:00.000-07:00

"Inside OUT, you know you're turning me. UPSIDE, down....round and round"

I have no idea who the artist was, but reasons unknown - that catchy little 80's tunage came across my foggy brain at say...oh, 7:00AM! Go back to sleep and change the station on the radio alarm.

2002-06-26T12:18:00.000-07:00

HUMP DAY
Whereas I'm not in the foul mood I was yesterday, my morale sure could use a kick start to get into proper rare form. I can't help but get a little down after foregoing YET ANOTHER P-town vacation for the sake of work efforts. I read everyday of the countdown towards what will be (and still holds true for me) yet another memorable Cape experience for others. GRRRRRRRRRR! What is it with this particular destination point that I can't seem to make from year to year? Aughhhhh! Send me a virgin to sacrifice, I need a miracle.....and could I get two of those -- while I'm asking....supersized and to-go, pleasethankyouverymuchnow.

On another note. For strange reasons (definitely unknown to me) a familiar waft of poppers drifts through the office from time to time this week. HEY YOU! Yeah YOU - -you in the next cube! What the fuck are you doing with that banana over there anyway!

2002-06-24T13:16:00.000-07:00

Call me a late bloomer (no comment) but I ordered take-out food to be delivered to the house for the FIRST TIME in my life. YES YES YES - I swear it's true. To this day (well, yesterday) I had not used a take-out menu for delivery. I've always picked it up or someone else has ordered it. None of my writing today is making sense when I read it. I think I'm going home at 2:30 and trying this again from scratch tomorrow.

2002-06-24T13:08:00.000-07:00

Trillium, Allium and other extraneous thoughts

There are those strange and unexplained visual "standouts" in one's mind from time to time. For those of of you that followed the OJ Simpson trial quite some years ago, you may recall the countless times cameras focussed on the front door to her home and the garage area. Well, for a plant person like myself - you couldn't help but notice the amazing hedge of deep purple agapanthus seemingly growing out of control.....(to the left of the above mentioned driveway). Well, here in CA they grow everywhere...and I mean everywhere. In the Rite-Aid parking lot, on the side of the road, and of course - conveniently located in our courtyard....just asking to be placed in a couture vase in my home.

Trillium, on the other hand - is whole different ballgame. Very rare, endagerered, almost never available for sale and flourished in the back yard that my former partner and I shared quite some years ago. Imagine our surprise when we realized what we stumbled upon.

Who knows where my train of thought is going today? I feel a little disconnected today (which could be contributed to the fact that I've spent a week in Vegas - the most dissconnected place on the planet). But all this disconnection is not sitting well.

Extraneous thoughts: disconnection

2002-06-19T14:49:00.000-07:00

LOVE, LUST, PASSION and outright sex.

I'm neither a connoisseur, nor a novice when it comes to addressing the above BULLET points in my life. However, after 28 years, I'm still troubled....that I haven't successfully mastered AND appropriately found rest for these items in my life. A string of disfunctional realtionships to my credits and I'm thinking the light at the end of the tunnel really is a TRAIN. If it is a TRAIN, will it run me over or take me to where I need to go next?

I think I can, I think I can, I think I can. PASSION is something that's there or isn't - - it's like energy...it's neither created or destroyed. Passion is when someone from your past walks by and you still get a woody. How's that WEBSTER?

No weekend plans - which will probably mean.....no weekend plans or another trip to the beach.

2002-06-04T13:00:00.000-07:00

High heels, low morals
Where were we?

When we last came together to chit-chat I was buying art at the five and dime - -in a complete and utter peaceful state of mind. Who knew that wouldn't last?

After a month with a temporary roommate, immediately came the in-laws. Keep in mind, I adore Rilla's family - but I just could not comprehend what we would do with them for six days. We quickly devised a plan. Drugs for us, cable TV for them. It was the most sensible, cost-effecient, course of action I've ever taken in my life. Note to self and others -

During the in-laws extended stay, began the final countdown at work for our product launch in Vegas. It's a nice size job that gets me out of the office for a good solid week and put's me in the center of it all - - - where in all truth, is where I belong. Other than that, all is going great. Well, almost - the truck is in the shop and I'm in dire need of a good vacation. Speaking of.........

New neighbors: Finally a reason to keep your door open....fun people (it's about time= 4:20). Andrew and his gal pal (still can't remember her name, but I know she has a left pireced nipple...cuz I saw it!) have just moved here from Seattle. Uprooting everything, packing in both their trucks, they moved to San Diego. WE gave them an award for best use of camping equipment as furniture...truly everything is collapsible and Boy Scout approved. It's nice to meet grounded people. It's not everyday you can let you hair down (along with your pants, your top, etc.) and have some good ole "fun in the sun" quality time at the beach. I didn't think people from Seattle were that liberal.!?!?

2002-05-31T11:37:00.000-07:00

On the seventh day of Purgatory my true love gave to me.........6 days of in-laws.......and a partridge in a pear tree.

2002-05-16T10:36:00.000-07:00

....found it at the five and dime....no, really!

Junior League Thrift stores are the best! If my endorsement's not enough ask this smart and savvy shopper, MUMS the word! Killing time before my Saturday haicut appt. at RAYSORZS ( I spelled it all wrong the first time - named after RAY, could you tell?) I popped across the street to the Junior league of GREATER San Diego*. Mind you that Rilla and I found a great danish modern piece there when we first moved for just pennies. Keeping my past good luck in mind, I browsed the the "home" section, if you will. No furniture and no bundt pans - so I was ready to throw in the towel, UNTIL....my eye caught a glimpse of a rather large mahogany frame. Low and behold...A FIND!

INSIDE NOTE:
I have been nagging the guys that work with me to build me a canvas. Something I could play with, create, who knows? Maybe SKETCH? (LMAO) At any rate, there it was. A large hand built frame, about 3 inches deep- which was perfect. But here's the clincher. So, after admiring the craftmanship of the frame, i spun that sucker around to admire what the hell it was framing (just knowing in the back of my mind - that IT HAD TO GO - no matter what paint by number artist had signed it). Well, what do you know? DAMN! DAMN DAMN! It turns about to be this great textured piece in a vibrant (dated, yet very trendy) lemon yellow. I swear, even a curator would agree - it could be an early Jackson Pollock. It's a keeper.

We haven't named it yet. Even though "IMPRESSIONIST ALARM" comes to mind when the early morning sun bounces off it while I'm trying to climb ou of bed. If only I could snooze it with a sheet! IT looks great - it sits off centered above our floating dresser at the foot of the bed - so MET HOME...I even capped the vignette off with a tubular glass vase volding a single acanthus leaf. I HAVE TO STOP THIS NOW! NO more descriptives of my home decor until I can download actual pictures..I promise

2002-05-15T15:28:00.000-07:00

speaking of trade shows.....try the Greater San Diego Chamber Of Commerce - business to business EXPO....ooh la-la

.....balloon arches, signaure baskets, specialized cookies, and leasing agents for institutional copier companies.

(can we say "up the bar" and we'll join)

2002-05-15T15:11:00.000-07:00

The Misadventures of Shawn and "Gloria" - Final season

Let's say, for instance, that in the final epsiode of this fun-filled narcotic sit-com, the following things occur:
Shawn crawls into identical Bronco only to find that it is not his and that this bronco in fact has a standard transmission.
Shawn loses glasses in identical bronco due to his frenzied and disoriented state of mind.
Shawn did not, HOWEVER, force entry into said IDENTICAL bronco. His keys opened the lock on identical bronco door.
What was Shawn doing looking for HIS bronco on the streets of Hillcrest when HIS bronco was parked at residence AND he walked to first alcoholic hovel of the evening?

Inquiring minds or representatives of GHBA would love to know.

2002-05-14T11:59:00.000-07:00

Too much, too soon, but not nearly fast enough

As jobs are slashed (like prices at a used car lot) I contiune to sit and try my damndest to adhere to "diddy's" old school sayings. None of this comes as any sort of a surprise. I mean you have management overseeing management - who is overseeing me - who asks me once a month...."so, whatcha' been up to". I don't equate the latter statment to hold any sort of resemblance to a sales meeting. Call me crazy!

On the bright side ( boy, there's a statement waiting for debate) - we have our second largest project of the year coming up. It's the launch for Arctic Cat, all terrain vehicles. The event will be held in Vegas at the MGM Grand ballrooms. I got the job!

My day is done - off to the lovey and spacious San Diego Convention Center for a few hours with our local Chamber of Commerce - Dear Lord grant me the strength!

2002-05-13T13:21:00.000-07:00

Is it Ben Franklin that said, "Fish and visitors smell in three days." - - -Oh Ben, you were a wise ass weren't you...and far beyond your years.

As of today, (at say 2:00PM PST) two of my fellow co-workers will no longer BEAR the title "fellow co-workers". I don't know whose the luckier one. As of 2:00 PM today, my vacation time is up for debate, my position possibly elevated, the thought of actually buying a place again becomes a THOUGHT and the "red-ness" from California sun "over"exposure fades to brown. Ahhhhh. Time? Spin it round, round it goes, where it's been? Hell - nobody knows.

Lingering thoughts that sit idle and fester:
-the need to desperately shine all black shoes - hell, brown ones too, for that matter
-the need to find a good shoe store - where the hell are they - it's CA for pete's sake
-it IS TRUE - the worst drivers in the world are ASIAN WOMEN
-why the woman at the dry cleaners is suddenly translation impaired when I say "no crease"
-why wasn' I thinking SUNBLOCK, yesterday
-never ever ever ever, appear at the HOLE earlier than 5:00 PM

2002-05-10T15:44:00.000-07:00

Like sands through the hourglass.......so is the AX in our workplace

You know, at one point my "diddy" sat me down and said, "son, there are times in a man life when he just can't miss a good opportuinty to SHUT UP!" - -NOTE TO SELF: I never really paid much attention to "diddy's" words of wisdom.

Speaking of things "coming down" - seems the ax is falling all around me. So long as it is around me, I'll take "diddy's" archived rural W.O.W (words o' wisdom) and SHUT UP.

NEXT ON THE AGENDA:
- Making plans for Gay Pride San Diego (much UNLIKE "go hide" Atlanta) for friends and trash to descend upon my humble hovel, take a load off their weary traveling legs, pop a keg and admire transvestites about town - that would be July27th. Nice llame thong, TRIXIE! - -speaking of washing your hands becuase you don't know where it's been.
- Debating whether a new CD should come before gas and electric bill. This should be the world's shortest internal conflict.
- Finishing up the second chapter in my new book "Despodent Friends", this chapter is entitled "Out of site, out of mind out of my hair - Atlanta, where's the love?".
- Understanding the true meaning of "personal perseverance". And NO, I don't have a word-a-day on my desk.
- Abondoning work early as to get my folicles fondeled at the new SALON down the street.... appropriately named with a lisp, "RAZORSSSSS" (GURLH!) Makes me ponder that old saying, "I'm a beautician, not a magician - this is a comb not a wand."
- Looking forward to a date with Rilla who's taking me to see SPIDERMAN - - - (squeal! He always had sharpest outift, next to Aquaman - in that whole Hall of Justice group.

After all that said and done, my weekend should be complete. That list AND about a gallon and a half of margaritas, actually!

2002-05-09T10:08:00.000-07:00

Where, oh where does the time go?

In the beginning of this whole blog thing, I thought if anything, this would be something therapeutic I could do.... EVERY DAY. I guess I set myself up for all sorts of life dissapointments, eh? This guilt too, shall pass.

I'm coming off of what had to be the most physically grueling, but career rewarding, four (somewhat sleep deprived) days.. Our company produces, manages and coordinates the entire tradeshow and convention for Manugisitcs ( a suplly chain software manag. co.) in conjunction with Sun Micro - it's a hell-of-a big deal. Needless to say there were many 3 hour and 2.5 sleep nights - sans chemicals - via adrenaline. I do say that subtle fun was had at one of the events I helped coordinate on Monday - Lee "GREEN"wood, not my favorite singer, but my favorite substance.

The week ahead is calm - the clanging of tractor trailer chains echo in the wharehouse as our staff begins to unload and store each stage set and exhibit booth. It's almost like the day after Christmas around here. So much hype and energy until the day - then, POOF -GONE! It's all over. The crowds go home, the crews take down their massive riggings, the trucks leave the docks and I find myself kicking aorund an old show program that's fallen to the floor.... on my way out the door.

2002-03-28T10:42:00.000-08:00

There's a little black spot on the sun today

There is strange occurence that's only getting stranger. Never fails...... the morning after an evening confrontation with the other half, I notice a large black crow (or some sorts perched) on an outcropping overpass light fixture. He sits there perched, oblvivious to the hazard whizzing below him...feathers being rufled by passing vehicles and gust of canyon winds. Perched, poised, and daunting. It's fascninated me enough to begin to take everyday notice of this strange and unsettling "phenomena" if you will.

Of course this silly bird doesn't know my home life. He has not sat outiside my home to hear of the evenings "goings on" in order to prepare for the next day "perching". He has no idea that he's the little black spot on the sun today. Or does he?

2002-03-22T14:35:00.000-08:00

Whereas I look at the progress my fellow bloggers have made in teaching themselves new tricks on this thing, I AM STILL JEALOUS! Dammit all to hell. I want pictures on my page too. Someone help me!

It's been a busy two weeks with no releif in sight. My senior marketing and sales counterparts will ( he and his wife - can you already see the conflict in interest) will be given their walking papers. There is no drama, there is no scandal. It was a simple fact of not correctly and effeciently doing one's job to their upmost potential. Now buh bye - I've always like the position of your cube in respect to the view it gives me of the bathroom door.

The spring blues have got me down. My other half is on the road more and more. There is a "whole family" of "koreans" (thank you frank) living below and around my chest. I have not cooked in two weeks. I still need a couch before my visitors come in April. I don't have my truck. AND.....drum roll please.......I don't have, what I consider, any real "friends" so far. Great! Now I've said it. Maybe it's the seratonin, maybe it's the "Santa Annas", as they call it out here. But whatever it is, I miss my initimate, witty, loving, somewhat "flake-free" group of Atlanta buds, that made my everyday so much more enjoyable. Cheers you guys. "Ya'll" are great - oh, and Frank, thanks for the PEEPS.

2002-03-08T10:21:00.000-08:00

One whole year - 365 days - 52 weeks - and some pretty great sunrises. Yep, it's true - Rilla and I have completed one whole year of blissful marriage. Marriage? nah, more like the acts of a three ring circus of fun, surprises, and bullwhips!

The Vegas Bar and Bev show was not all that - FYI

All of the east coast investors have been in the office this week. This means sun up to sun down meetings. I mean 5, 6, 7 hour meetings! My body is not adapting very well to the uncomfortable chair my rear has become attatched to. Power point (while maybe back in it's day, was interesting) is not the most effective way to keep my attention. At least with not with the limited use of a three color slide. C'mon boys - we're special events pros....where's the damn fireworks!!!!! At least bring out a drag queen for some intermission fun.

Enough -Enough - -I'm dragging and this coffee isn't doing anything but pissing me off. We have another meeting today - the last in a full blown succession of 5! I'm tired, I'm hungry - I want to go back to the warm bed where Rilla still is. Calgon take me away?

2002-02-22T23:46:00.000-08:00

Nevermind the Gender lines
Tonight marks a considerable turning point in the life of SRW. After many cocktails with Tricia (good luck with the crossword boy) , our contact from the Gaslamp Mardi Gras riots...Lisa (WONDERFUL PERSON du' jour) and I end up at our place discussing children and what not.

Lisa, co-worker, mother of one (Vincet -in the terrible two's - but still very capapble of saying "hey Shawn, watcha' doin') , wife of one of the few equal sharing parents (you're an incrdible LUCKY guy - hold on to THIS one) that I know, shared an incrdeble evening with me - after all work was done. The evening was set, simply to meet and re-cap with our Gas-lamp coordinant Tricia, and then..take it from there. Guys, girls, and the like..she's one of us....I can't wait til' you meet her. Simply put....the mold was broken when God put this one out MANY THANKS TO GOD, for one, LOL). She get's it! Enough, enough! She'll get the big head. She and i will be venturing to Vegas at the beginning of next month for bev. and bar show. Keep posted for further review. You fellow bloggers..now welcome Lisa...

XOXOXOXOXOXO - Kudos

2002-02-21T12:33:00.000-08:00

Internet Marketing for the Masses

Much to my shagrin, my first attempts at conquereing the web were not so successful. Some pages open, some don't. The story of my life is carried on through the recent "quirks" with our first company newsletter. Not that big of a deal, not worth writing about.

Mindlessly singing at the top of my lungs to Sara M - the remixes - caused me to miss my exit this morning. Obsessed with knowing all road systems (shortucts, traffic patterns, and scenic ways to work) I took the I-5 (which runs along the bay and on into La Jolla and eventually to L.A.) to work this morning. NOTE: I usually take the 5 home so I can see the sunset on the bay. Well, this morning I had to get gas and the car was pointed in the direction of the 5, so I took it. Long story short, it wasn't such a bad ordeal - -I just kept looking at all the new construction and saying "boy, this sure does look different comin' than it does when I leave work.....hmmmm.....maybe it's the light" LMAO It wasn't the light, it was the road.

Promo tonight at Bourbon St. Pub. We have a new guy to replace the jerk that continually no shows AND isn't all that attractive anyway. If I were Smirnoff, I would be glad I canned him - -we don't want THAT kind of promotion. New guy ( Allan ) is friends with my other promo guy (Kevin)...blah blah blah - - he was able to fill in, last minute. The funny thing about Kevin is that claims to be straight. However, I never go through a night without hearing - - "Still straight?" Obviously he's been a little "gay for pay" in the past. If you know what I mean. Ahh, California - such a nice mix of people....and quality, at that.

2002-02-19T19:05:00.000-08:00

Gosh Father it's been 13 days and nine hours since my last confession, um, I mean, BLOG. Can you forgive me?

Okay - it's been a bitch of a past two weeks. For Starters.....
- Mardi Gras riots in San Diego..did you hear about' em? Well, sister - I was there, and let me tell you. THEY WERE PISSED!
- Doing taxes for two is NOT easier than doing taxes for one!
- I picked up "thigh" chicken meat yesterday in the grocery thinking it was "breast". I guess I should have been straight longer and I could have avoided that little shopping error.
- How DOES one cook "thigh" meat? When is it done?
- We're short one guy for the promo tonight at Numbers (they are having a featured go-go boy contest...whoopeeeee!)
- Shawn reaches all time low and buys a fifth of Smirnoff vodka to have with dinner.....thigh meat.....did you guess?
- Bad day to curtail your nicotine intake by 1/2 of your normal puffs.
- Where is my husband to hold my head and tell me that "happiness is just around the bend"?

Ahhhhh...Thank God! I think the vodka is kicking in! Time for a bath and a cigarette.

2002-02-06T11:04:00.000-08:00

Yeah! Billabong and Rusty Reps coming for a early afternoon meeting today about their booth deisgn for later this month. I could learn to surf

Pre- Mardi Gras press party with boss and wife at the Gaslamp district Masquerade ball this evening. Feelin' kinda witchy, I am!

Andersen Consulting in beginning of next week (depsite Enron scandal) to perform site visit on SD - Shawn in tow of course

Heading up to LA next week to make two presentations for entertainment production companies - Lisa in TOW!

Smirnoff promotion tomorrow - Looks like another foggy Friday morning - oh well

The boys at the hardware store are game for hiking this weekend along with a small consumption of malt beverage

2002-02-04T07:52:00.000-08:00

Game...........GOOD!
Yager shots...BAD!
Sleep depravation from sobering RED BULLS......even worse.

2002-01-31T08:16:00.000-08:00

Yesterday's evening with the Rock Bottom boys went very well. Between Lisa, Robert, and Myself we walked away convincing them that 25K to re-work the interior of their crakcer box, cinderblock, sing sing, was simply not enough - we suggested 50K. Frightened that I would get an whack on the back of my head from my boss, I was still confident in my numbers. The three of us later bellied up to a nearby bar for MArtinis and Bourbon - only to have a toast made to me for "havin' some kinda balls at my age to tell them where not to waste what little money they had" -Robert Bottoms. Next thing you know wer're talking about disco clubs in Amsterdam and smokin' "big fatties". Which, come to find out,happens to be the poison of choice, when paired with a nice bottle of french bordeaux....for my boss and his wife. WHO"D A THUNK IT?

Lisa and I pour ourselves onto the street and go shopping to SOBER her up. Lisa, Lisa - was wearing Giraffe print pants, vintage light brown waist coast and stack 70's boots to match...Whoah! She rocks. I of course, was in a smart Ike Bahar sharkskin red shirt with new graphite strectch pants from banana rep. That ourfit worked...note to self....pushing box, nice ass action, GREAT HAIR day (wasted on a bunch of straight people, but hey) and square-toe black Kenneth's - - the gay mafia was out.

Alrighty troops - time to get into the shower, turn up Bebel.....CAN WE SAY "Sade ain't got shit on her"....she rocks..she gets the SRW "go out and get it now award" Forget the mortgage, nevermind the power bill it's' MUSIC people. Yes, just like Madonna said, "It's music that makes the people come together." And it's fucking lyrics like that keep me believing that shit.......power bill? Maybe next month.....new remixes from Manny.....well, yes....I can justify that 30 bucks...LOL

2002-01-31T07:57:00.000-08:00

Simple pleasures of the morning:Rilla' giving me a sexy wake-up call from his room in Toronto
Instant Grits - Cheddar cheeze pleeze!
The vioce of Bebel Gilberto (very Sade-esque brazilian chick who is latest in my CD collection)
-Bebel Gilberto, Tanto Tempo, the remixes
Trader Joes Ultra Bay Blend coffee, freshly ground with sugar substitute (pancake syrup - because I have forgotten sugar for the last three days.
A morninh Blog.Oh, Oh, and a two shots of my "Loving Light Adaptogen Tonic". Our friend in LA turned us onto it, we know refer to it as "HILLBILLY CRACK" because the shit is so strong.....you literally feel the warmth as it hits your bloodstream. Fantatastic Stuff...I bought a GALLON, go figure!

I want to learn how to buddy BLog and insert pictures - I'm so jeal!

2002-01-29T12:59:00.000-08:00

akafrankgreen: there you go
ShawnRWaters: fortune cookie message from lunch " you will live long and enjoy your life" - -just great
akafrankgreen: ah
akafrankgreen: trixy, there's a much overlooked drag name. genius, actually
ShawnRWaters: and a perfectly stocked tray ranging from Visine to Ranch flavored Doritos. to Dujarum clove cigarettes.....gotta love drag with a purpose
akafrankgreen: that's a serious cig girl.
akafrankgreen: doritos! could use some of those at 8am at b/s
ShawnRWaters: why? ya'll have the FRENCH FRIE MACHINE
akafrankgreen: reminds me of our tobasco-flavored "dinner" at b/s that time
akafrankgreen: exactly
akafrankgreen: sometimes a hot dog stand outside. matt always manages to find the corn dogs but i've never seen them. he brought one to the dance floor once. it was just all so wrong.
akafrankgreen: i meant cheez-it dinner
ShawnRWaters: SUKI SUKI NO.......
ShawnRWaters: at any rate, work "hast" to be done by me or some underpayed, non-green card holding staff member here....gotta run

2002-01-29T12:47:00.000-08:00

I attempted to go out on Saturday. Mike and Brad came by to pick us up. Steve had fallen asleep and didn't want to go. I went anyway ( who knew?) I had a pass!!!!. The music, needed improvement. The crowd, very mixed, I like THAT. The sound...fucking amazing. Reminds me of the A-house back in P-town. It's called Montage, but could very be misread and called COLLAGE. Appears to have the looks of cut and paste in lieu of two by fours and dance-floor space. Very Backstreet-esque. Three levels, outdoor space, four stairwells for you "business" and lot's of loft like space for dance floor observation. P>S> lot's of glitter...still don't know what to think about that? HMMM Bonus of the evening of was a trio of 6'5" drage queens posed as cigarette girls. TRIXY, kisses for you and from saving me the walk to the BP for Camels. LOVE THE TEAL ORGANZA HOUSECOAT too.

Sunday was spent doing laundry in between runs to FLICKS for afternoon cocktails, pool, and 'Ms. PacMan. What a wonderful life I lead. You know your spoiled when you play a game of pool, suck down a beer, and excuse yourself for one game to walk one block away and put your laundry in the dryer. Ahhhh, CA...this is the life for me. Black longsleeved t-shirt reading 100% NEGRO on cute white guy bar. To bad Tom couldn't get the girlfriend drunk. Better luck next time boy! BTW - you SUCK AT POOL!

Shout out to Tom - -how's those 'copters comin'?

2002-01-29T12:33:00.000-08:00

This weather has got to GIVE! Rainy today, rainy yesterday , RAINY tomorrow. I'm glad your gettin' all yo' moisture issues out now, CALIFORNIA, cuz come SPRING TIME, this white azz is gonna need some of those desert rays shinin' down on it!

Promo went great on Thursday. Sketchy guy from LA came down and couldn't even focus on the excel spreadsheet. And I know sketchy when I see sketchy. AND THAT...was SKETCHY. It's amazing the sudden poularity one has when a gay bay discovers that cute boy #1, #2, and #3 all possess cash coupons for cocktails. Holding court is effortless. Getting their attention is cunningly facilitated, holding my attention.... is well....your my friends, you understand. Little leo wouldn't dare pass this opportunity up. "Get me to do something twisted" is the promo theme. I think I can pull this one off.....hands down, eyes closed. However, most fun is doing this with husband in tow - (we're kinda like the tag team Charlie's Angels). Of course He's Farrah and I'm Jacqueline. It's just the way it is.

2002-01-24T11:00:00.000-08:00

What's up with me and these dreams of "traveling". Twin2 has my mind spinning with possibilities. Did you say you wanted your room painted blue?

In less than two very short months..the most wonderful man I've ever met and I will celebrate one full year. This year, for me (personally), has flown by with surprises, defeat, victory, utter groundbreaking honesty, and communication. This is what keeps me going every day. If it's this good at year, baby, we're gonna take the world in five.

2002-01-24T10:37:00.000-08:00

It's a chilly 55 degrees and I'm sitting here wondering...where oh where have my sunny beach weekends gone? The cold weather has me moving slow and grateful for my recent move to So. California. I'm spoiled already by the phenomenal moderate climate, even for the "winter" months. I want SUN, SUN, SUN....daddy needs some COLOR, COLOR, COLOR! I feel as white as....well, I just feel white, and let's leave it at that...shall we?

There's a sackful of dirty drycleaning in my trunk, an angry Asian lady at the cleaners thinking I've abadoned half my "press"able wardrobe, and a filthy comforter lying in the trunk. Can I have a maid "to-go" please? Just one will do! I promise I'll treat her with care. We'll call her Consuella Conjita Ajax.....we'll let her bring her children to the house, where they can play while Mama works. She can speak in her native tongue, and I soon will catch on and relate. Soon she will cook flautas, conquitos, and fresh-from-scratch flan. We will learn each other's culture and my house will be clean and organized. I will pay her nothing, and she will be flattered. She will send the money back to her homeland where she will able to support 15 family members from just her paycheck alone......sigh....the AMERICAN DREAM or just a HOUSEKEEPING FAIRY TALE?

Ed and his partner come down from L.A. tonight to brief us on the Smirnoff promotion for the next several weeks. No expectations! I know that at the very least, I will skip away with non-taxable cash in pocket paired countless contacts for the greater San Diego area...not bad...I love my entrepreneural spirit. You either label it that OR "exploitive capabilities"......I'm all about the positive spin these days.

2002-01-24T10:15:00.000-08:00

Ugh - I just lost a whole page of Blog!!!!!!!
http://notyournormalleo.blogspot.com

2002-01-24T10:13:00.000-08:00

2002-01-23T13:40:00.000-08:00

How is it that a week can pass where I don't have a single second to jot down my thoughts? It's insane. It's goes from "I've got complete control over everything" to utter chaos in a matter of a single day. Work is great, I sold my first job to Rock Bottom Brewery last week only to find that after my meeting today, that they would like to double thier budget for the discussed items/ services. Even in my groggy state, I was elated with the news which translates into: new couch, recover chairs, down payment on European Vacation - -if you put things into "proper" prespective, it's much easier to do my job.

The weekend was, "by my standards", uneventful..... and really look forward to the next weekend being the same. I've yet to hit a bar for a RAGE on dance your "ass-ass off night". Soon, Soon, very soon...I deserve it! I need a little release! Of all places, I'm here in a music MECCA, there's two dance bars within a BLOCK of my house!!!!! What is wrong with me???

Very very soon DAYLIGHT savings time makes its comeback. Oh happy day! Oh happy day!

This week is adopt a NAVY BOY WEEK. Thought you should know! Go out and let those boys know just how proud you are of them. LET YOUR SPIRIT SHOW!

2002-01-16T08:38:00.000-08:00

T-I-N-G-O, T-I-N-G-O, T-I-N-G-O and TINGO was his name-o

One of my friends TIngo is in town tonight from Actionville, Fl. Tonight's his Birthday, whatever shall we do?

No Heretic, No Eagle, No Backstreet,
as far as the eye can see.
My, My, My, where must fun trouble be?
I'll make 5 simple phone calls,
Those five will make five too.
Before you have time to blink an eye,
we'll have located fun trouble for you.
-SRW

2002-01-16T08:28:00.000-08:00

Who's stalking WHO?

You know, it's tough moving into a new town and meeting new people (for some folks). However, Monday morning I awoke to a note placed on our car (from another tenant, whom we have not met or seen, for that matter) introducing himself. He started by noticing our Georgia plates, and went on about how he had spent time in the south and that he was "finally" glad to see some "southern boys" move out to San Diego. STRANGE? WE THOUGHT SO. He went on and on in his diatribe about all "fake" people of california and the "flakes" in the community. JUST KINDA STRUCK ME WIERD.....he knows there's two of us because he addressesd it "hey boys". His window is right outside where we park our car, so maybe that's the answer to how he knows there's more than one of us. The other answer is that he can probaly hear our voices resonating throughout the courtyard. Steve got off the elevator the other day and was able to hear every word of my cell phone conversation at a half a building's length....GIRL next door neighbor, Sister Mary TIna must be EDUCATED BY NOW...and she lives next DOOR.

At any rate we gave this MYSTERY guy a call, he was not home, WHEW - - saved again. HOWEVER, we did locate the hottie couple we saw frisbee'ing in the park. THEY ARE UNIT 209..NOW who's stalking who?

Saturday we meandered down to Black Beach for some January Sun....there could be worse places to move to, I keep reminding myself. Tragic nudity was the re-occuring theme of the day on the beach. SUKI SUKI NO!

Sunday was spent at Kolby's swap meet - KInda like Lakewood, Kinda NOT......A little bit country ( HUGE KUNTRY, if you know what I mean), a little bit rock and roll. QUESTION: that whole PUNK era, that went away witht the 80's right? Just wondering, still seeing alot of the egg-white enhanced urchin pointy hair cuts....and eyeliner on guys. HELLO!! PETE BURNS (Dead or Alive) IN NO LONGER A ROCK ICON..CHECK INTO IT!!!!

We bought a little bouquet for Sister Mary Tina ( Nun Neighbor Extrodinarie ) - she was really taken back by the gesture...enough to warrant a prayer candle to be lighted for us every night. Really, sh'e s a super sweet lady who recently had outdoor thermometer snatched off her window by one of the other nieghbors. We felt bad for her - even looked for a replacement one - but instead just whipped up a sensible bouquet and said VOILA! Done!

New girl started at work last week. BONUS..SHE "get's it" - - fast pace humor is her forte - and she is quick, let me tell ya. Give me two months and she and her husband will fill the two empty slots at the house in Palm Springs for the White Party. Just watch and see. She has a two year old which is cute as all hell. Are my mothering instincts kicking back in - or do I just want a child to bring to the park as a PROP. I'm struggling with this one...help me out folks.

2002-01-10T10:02:00.000-08:00

....and fellow Leo, please don't take me off of your "blogger list", PLEASE PLEASE..I don't know if I can take that kind of rejection.

.....at least not unitl I can return the favor... NYNL (squared)

2002-01-10T09:45:00.000-08:00

Whew - what a whirlwind holiday season THAT WAS! We we meant to go up to LA for just the day two days before Christmas. Well...we ended up coming back on Christmas day, I love spontaneous trips! Three days in (jaded) LA was just what I needed to put in me in the ripe ole TRUE (fashionably at least) Holiday Spririt. NOTE TO SELF: NEVER SAY MERRY CHRISTMAS IN LA! You'll here more."don't you mean..happy Quanza?...Hannukah? Felize Navidad...or simply just HAPPY HOLIDAYS! You kind of forget that here in West Hollywood (especially out at "the" newest bar in town), you're either Jewish, agnostic (by the way I did cornered by some guy who later in the converation admitted to have seen spirits) - I didn't have the nerve to tell him "yeah buddy, you sure have! ...they are all on your breath!!.......OR your SIMPLY SOUTHERN BAPTIST, in search of a "mary" good time. You gotta love the melting of California.

My preacher back home once commented "California!.....just like a granola bar......full of fruits, nuts, and flakes" - - -well said Reverend - - Amen!

We loaded and went to Palm Springs. It was fun..to the Oneth degree....nothing exponentional. It was like a mini - White Party without all MOMENTUM and heat. Tea-Dance by theWyndham Pool with a grinding mass of spandex clad bodies was the highlight FOR SURE. Gina, Myself, Steven and little group from LAguna Camped out at the corner of the pool that was to get the last glint of sun (strategic of course) - it was like a spotlight (of NATURAL light - you know light an AURA) - -while everyone else was dancing in the afterglow of sunset....IT WAS HOT!

I'm ready for Easter though!!!!! With two Palm Springs events under my belt..it's time to break put the "been there, done that (him) badge" and start whipping a plan of F.U.C.K.= FUN into action. The wheels needs greasin , they're startin' to BURN BABY BURN, DISCO IN"FIERCE"MO, BURN BABY BURN......

2001-12-17T13:38:00.000-08:00

DEFINITIONS

#1 - - Good: relative to situation and left up to one's own opinion

#2 - - Bad: See definition of Good

#3 - - Too Fast: as in, driving "too fast". See definition of Good and Bad. Could be one or both depending on situation. See definition of "relative"

2001-12-17T13:02:00.000-08:00

FRUITCAKE ENCHILADA...anyone?

Naughty or NICE? Like there's even a question!

If I've been THAT bad, then screw you Santa, I'll buy my own list. And on top of that I'll have you replaced by a more motivated (lower payed, but still moreappreciatve - - oh and can I add....in better physical shape) HOLIDAY ICON. Ladies and Gentlemen, I present the Merry Mexican (thank you NAFTA). Just South of the Border....Labor is cheaper, meaning more toys at the same "good" behavior rate. So LONG Santa!

2001-12-17T10:20:00.000-08:00

/
KNOXVEGAS, here we come.
Fantastic weekend with the inlaws in Maryville, TN. Mornings spent over homecooked biscuits and bacon gravy, YUM. Late night on Saturday with Aunt Betty and Jessica - up at her flawless mountain cabin, chain smoking cigarettes, eating popcorn, watching Castaway (that's the only element that doesn't fit) and hearing her tell stories of her 32 person water volleyball groups she has sometimes in the summer. BETTY=FUN! WE LOVE AUNT BETTY!

Friday: Steve is stuck on 75N traffic coming from Atlanta -from Company Christmas party. Delta Loses Shawn's bags. We stay up until 2:30 catching up with Steve's "Gee".

Saturday: Wake up at Noon, Go to grave site, Shawn does not one, not two, but three arrangements (silk of course, my favorite medium) for the Rilla's "pa paw" and kin for the Holiday season. Take long tour through country side (thank's Gee - you really DO know where they live - I believe you!!) Stake claim on family property for Steve to Inhereit so we can raise horses and have care taker manage the boxwood festooned grounds. (GORGEOUS federal style house - that would be four rooms over four rooms....with slave quarters behind the house..WOW) That night - go to AUNT BETTY'S.

Sunday: Get up at 10. Icicle lights - first priority - Shawn and Rilla up on ladder hanging icicle lights - - WHO'D OF THUNK THAT!! We fix fab 50's metallic Christmas tree, have lovely breakfast, burn one, and go to airport. Delta gives bag back to Shawn - yes, this is from Friday...they just now found it and I'm flying out. I've had no clothes OR personals the entire trip. LOVELY - - PAyback...they hand search ENTIRE bag and contents, I get lovely lady...she pulls out eveything....sweaters, BIG bottle of LUBE, unopened packageof rubbers and the like. You can only imagine her surprise. I LOVE MY LIFE..

Monday Morning: Ears finally pop at 10:30 AM

SOMEONE has a faulty FURNACE this morning.....hmmmm

2001-12-12T08:52:00.000-08:00

Over the weekend, Rilla and I were laughing at our latest (before the out west excursion) hair care product purchase. A smart little divided conatiner with two different hair care products (if you will) . One for "shine" and one for "hold". The only drawback was that neither side was labeled as to which was what. After much discussion, we applied them to our hair to finally put the subject to rest.

Both held and both shone...go figure. Hence forth the "reality and perception pommade" was born. The "perception" is you're buying something to do two jobs, the REALITY is that I'll never waste another dime on a VIDAL SASOON product that only leaves me with confused hair. What a complex this product must give to my folicles...they don't know whether to shine or hold? Ugh! TOTAL consumer neurosis is born....and they say passive agrresive behavior is genetic. Hold, shine...no hold....no, no, no....SHINE.....well, okay...Hold! That head of hair has been through an exhausting emotional battle within itself....and I'm oblivious and on my second cup of coffee.

Little cockatil soiree tonight at "The Top Of The Park"...should be fun. Great invite at least. My favorite, velum stationery and black New Courier style font (reminiscent of a typing book instruction manual) -- - or serial killer ransom note. You pick! Shine or Hold?

2001-12-10T11:56:00.000-08:00

BREAKING NEWS: SERATONIN LEVEL REACHES ALL TIME HIGH

2001-12-10T09:03:00.000-08:00

Busy Weekend!!!

-Pick-up steve from auropuerta (it's spanish for airport....must integrate and use one spanish word a day so to better commubnicate with asian lady at dry cleaners....you figure out that MATH).
-Lovely evening at home on Friday, I make Fajitas, I make big mess in kitchen...fajitas not to be made in home (fajitas made to be purchased at sit down dining establishment, where they clean up fajita mess)

-Saturday AM #1 Christmas Tree, #2 Fabric Store (we made our own stockings...more details on that..I'm sure you want to know), #3 Search for 40's style filing cabinet, #4 RIte-Aid for No-sew Hem tape (yeah, hot glue no more...hello no sew fabric tape), #5 EAT , #6 Eat again, #7 Take shelves to ACE HARDware store to be cut..they love us there, #8 Come home begin tree, #8.25 I make lovely dinner, we eat with good silver and cloth napkins ( we have arrived), #8.5 Hem the sage colored drapes (IKEA SPECIAL) for the guest bathroom, #9 Rilla untangles all messy balls of hooks and string and such...perfect project for his state of mind, 10# Abondon Shelf project until the week of Christmas..it involved too much Math.
Decorate the holiday tree listening o tunes from MOBY, Sara M., Ibiza Del Mar (really get's you into that warm and cozy "ambient" Holiday mode), and some Mandalay.

-Sunday AM: BLading in the park (Shawn proceeds to have major face first wipe out, promptly gets up, brushes of and asks "How was my form?" I hold up my hands like I have the "boxing heavy weight division belt in my hands"...and say woo hoooo....then finish jaunt through park. ( I AM SO SORE AND BRUISED ...GOT NEOSPORIN?)

NEXT: We make our stockings...neither of us had attempted such a thing before ( well I had, but my bonding medium was hot glue...this was my "first time" with the "NO SEW" tape) They are hilarious...will post pics when I figure out how! Stocking craft hour followed up by glamour shots with the stockings on our feet ( in the basking glow of the Cailfornia sun beaming through the window). Capped off the night with "Legally Blonde".
Other half was NOT interested in watching above said "silly" movie......YOU and I should have seen it before I left. We could have a repeat night reminiscent of the Austin Powers evening!

NEXT BLOG'S TOPIC: The new and improved "Perception and Reality Pommade......It's not just for blonde's anymore"

2001-12-07T10:33:00.000-08:00

NEW FORMAT KIDS - much brighter and better on the eyes

2001-12-07T10:21:00.000-08:00

AWWWW. My favorite little rave kid / marriage reconciler / rehab refuser / party boy / sex slave / and all around good guyhas paid me a tribute! LOVE, LOVE SYNTHETIC LOVE! People all around from HOME are getting all mushy on me. Get it together troops, sit up straight in your seat, and repeat after me...thou shall not show emotion on the DANCEFLOOR. (KInda like "no parkin' baby...no parkin on the dancefloor")

Cocktail re-cap.......with the boys of the Hotel Del
Always remember less is more! WIth MARTINIS, FABRIC, AND KNICKNACKS. Most imprtantly MARTINIS! Fortunatley I'm blesed with the gift of understanding people long after they should not be allowed to speak under the influence ( of whatever..you pick your device...I'm multi-lingual....I speak English, Drunk - with slight southern dialect, and SKETCH -- very proficiently, no matter what the region). Two Queens in Surround sound slur....WAS a bit much for my translation skills yesterday. It began with them all prpoperly positioned ( I mean, they had sat in this chair before, helf their glass this certain way, crossed and re-crossed their legs and made sure that when the sun was setting...that it was in my eyes.....AND simlutanteously casting a lovely glow on them ) even meticulously rehearsed - on the couches in the BAR! WHO KNEW! After the sun fell into the bay - it was drink after drink after drink.....for them..I limited myself to two. THEN PROMPTLY SWITCHED TO GIN AND TONICS...to help me sober up. I think we wrapped things up something like..blah blah blah (SLURRRRRRRRRRRR); hee hee snicker snicker (QUEENS WILL BE QUEENS) and made mention of going out for drinks sometime. (what the HELL had we been doing for two hours?......DRINKS) We never spoke of work once......I have found MECCA! Is the HOTEL DEL a guise as HOTEL CALIFORNIA?

Busy Day..I'm literally walking out the door to the mall to return candles, and ill-fittin shirt from Banana.

Play LIST: Ibiza del Mar
Ultimate Ibiza
Ibiza (best of) Hammock and House Mixes
Club goers Guide to Ibiza (1999) - many thanks Bret

2001-12-06T13:58:00.000-08:00

"who's that eatin' that nasty food?......nasty girls!.....who's that doin' that nasty dance?....nasty girls!......LADIEEEEEEES!....NASSSTTTYYYYY, GIRLS!" < hee hee hee, haa ha ha ha ha - - rolling on the floor>
- Ms. Jackson

Don't know why that's in my head...I really dislike Janet Jackson

Lunch meeting at Hotel canceled last minute. The Gay Mafioso is my contact there. Somehow this morning there was some sort of "DRAMA" - go figure! So, lunch meeting has now been re-scheduled for cocktails...later today...even better!

News AT 6:00 for cocktail re-cap

2001-12-03T22:20:00.000-08:00

let me "git' a shout out" to RILLA in Tulsa, OK this week.

2001-12-03T22:15:00.000-08:00

Hi ho, hi ho it's off to work I go.........

By the way, where WAS that damn market that those dwarfs peddled those big-ass rocks. Hmmm, food for thought, maybe not. Probably why they call them fairy tales, hugh?

First full 8 hour day of work. WOW! Scope of work, tremendous...client base....extremely diverse....and I have my fingers in every aspect already. In a nut shell, Image Events is gearing itself to begin a very aggressive marketing and hard sell campaign to promote the new branch of the company (hence, why I'm here in this office..LOL) which is themed environments. We are putting together a CD rom presentation to send out to clients including Disney, the Warner Bros companies, Sea World, FAO swartz etc. You get the picture! The guys that work here have many years of art school training from some of the best art institutes in the country. From web design , graphics, sculpture, welding, scenic backdrop painters, illustrationists and amazing woodworkers..you name it, and we shared a cigrarette today discussing it all...6 cigarettes total! In the mean time (during the process of cd production) I'm downloading the book of lists for San Diego...courtesy of the San Diego Business Journal..which happens to be online...LOVE THE INTERNET (Top 20 most profitable companies...in their respected catagories) and hitting their special events and meeting planning depts. with loads of helpful info as to why they need us to produce their next convention.......yes, convention, we also have a destination mgmts side that is another developing branch of the company. This will be our bread and butter until we have reached full operating potential with the corporate themeing end of things. Sound like a plan? I hope so...I'm drafting up tomorrow's to do list for me...let's keep our finger's crossed that this little bit of business with Sea World gives us good press as we go on site to do the permanent installation at the Aquarium next week...

Thought of the day......."what I've learned....that a smile is an inexpesive way to improve your looks"
....umm hmmm, guess it depends on how much you spent on that mouth in order to get it where you had something to grin about....

-which reminds me..must go to Dentist soon....mini Snicker's bars (thanks STEVE) can't be all that great for the mouth.
-play list for today included: Cafe Del Mar - volume cinco
Danny Rampling - 2 CD series - 10th anniversary (purple vinyl padded case..XOXO)
Joey Negro - Nite Life....woo hoo...much like Night at the Playboy mansion, though.
YOKUM - from the guys who brought you Buddah Bar..it's a not so mystical sound of the indian culture (dot, not woo woo)..I mean wailing women and the clanking of brass cymbals (ching ching ching,,,yang yang,,hung yung, ting ting....eeeeeyyyahhhhh, eeeyahhhh, eeeeeeeiiiiIIIIIII!!!!!!....is alright for about two songs, then...it's time to hit Mama's "hookkah" pipe for a little releif of the stresses of today...you know, here in the modern world and all.

I think Cher's in danger of resurfacing in my travel CD case to work tomorrow............."I Believe....."? Anyone?

2001-12-02T20:02:00.000-08:00

Life amongst the ruins?

Much too much has happened since the dull, dull days of blogging from the dismal corners of my office at E.D.G. Not that E.D.G. was in the least bit DULL or DISMAL...hell, that place had more spunk than most K-4 classes, but the overhead flourescents were all but single handedly responsible for my gloomy outlook most mornings. ( at least I tell myself that lie). Let me get a shout out to my homeboy DANIELLE...out at the crib on Fulton Industrial. YO YO YO ! Word!!!!!!!

It's too late to back track and give all the 411 on the "quick" trip cross country. The story is CLASSIC beyond belief (not for some of you) but the tale , EPIC in writing proportions......I'll be doing that in installations once life has resumed some order here on west coast.

The past couple of days have been filled with green clouds of smoke, long trips to IKEA (3 hours later...we surface for air, near the check-out...coincidentally), and oh yes....let's not forget....drum roll PLEASE.......THE CONTAINER STORE! Which for most of you, this may be appear to be a merely a store to help that desperatley little housewife get a handle on those rowdy clipped stacks of coupons............BUT, rest assured this is a fundamental, almost religious MECCA for the AR gay man. JUST today I customized my own drawer insert (complete with interlocking - - lego like - -pieces) which let me have bins for post-its, pen, cutlery, paperclips...the list goes on and on like Santa's naughty list.

The weather - say no more - I'm sold.

The apt. is coming together quickly (amazing when you finally have cash) both of us have really kicked in and knocked it out (among other things). Seth came to visit last night. Our first visitor...WOOO HOOOOO. It s a spacious 1, 000 sq ft. 2br. 2ba in Hillcrest. One block off of University (the main DRAG, no pun intded) and one block from the park. Hillcrest Towers is a smart little 40 unit complex , rectangular in shape, built around a center courtyard...THE DEAL. We have a pool, workout, laundry, BLAH BLAH BLAH. The best is we have had a chance to meet the neighbors. The worst is that it is a no smoking complex..PERIOD.

We had the lovely honor of meeting our NEXT door neighbor last night. Next being defined by the fact that our headboards probably share the same seperating wall from one another. She (unassumingly) rounded the coner yesterday, my bloodshot eyes met her well rested (yet cataract ridden) ones..he intoduced herself to Stephen and I...I went insided...they chit chat for a bit..( I had to leave converation to go and extinguish cigarette..NO NO #1)..I return...Stephen leaves (to go fnish cigarette in bathroom)...she and I chit chat....she exclaims out of the blue that she is a nun and is Catholic....I reply (from God knows where) that we were both Southern Baptist and that how N.I.C.E. it was that she was a Cathloic nun and living next door. GO FIGURE!
Needless to say Steve and I now make jokes about the laundry room and it doubling as a confessional closet.

B.I.G. week ahead...2nd day of work tomorrow followed by afternoon shopping for Holiday tree and new gym to join.

2001-11-15T07:19:00.000-08:00

Today is my last event with Event Design Group. Very nervous, didn't sleep much, and had ongoing nightmares of trussing falling haphazardly on important guests. Some of my props are still wet with a fresh coat of paint, Daniel has yet to arrive with the chargers for the guest seating tables, and my palms have failed to show their fronds at the loading dock. STRESSED? Nope, not at all. It is what it is. AND what it's not, it still IS.
Peace, love and patience.
Shawn

2001-11-06T08:18:00.000-08:00

Days like today remind me of why I like (loathe, sympathize, empathize and am epowered by) the lyrics of Alanis Morriset. "It's like the free ride, when you've already paid...the good advice, that you just can't take"..........."who would have thought it figured"......."isn't it ironic". Hell yeah it is. All of life right now is one big slice irony birthday cake. "Here you go....blow out the candles....make a wish" - -- -I'm a little ill tempered this AM can you tell?

In addition to the pains of moving cross country, I have non-Christians, an ex-boyfriend, and a monkey on my back.....let's play charades......I'm a pack mule that doubles as an emotional tampon. PLEASE....all that are wounded, BLEED on me. I'm double the absorbancy but twice as light, you know....for heavy flow days. EBB tide here we come.

The carpet comes on Thursday. Yeah. That means I can drink red wine carelessly all over the old carpet and forget to use the ashtray. Nothing makes me happier....at least today!

I'm in a better mood already thinking of the new bottle of Penfold's Bin #2 Syrah - waiting for me. Watch out!

2001-11-02T10:15:00.000-08:00

Still here folks. I'm sitting at my desk (face all broken out) typing away at my computer, "wandering" whether or not I really feel like driving down to see my folks. I guess I'll sit here another couple of hours and think it through.
Note to Self: Touch base with digital diary by end of afternoon to let it know weekend plans.

2001-10-25T09:30:00.000-07:00

Comfort Zone

Welcome back folks! I figured, being that I'll be personally MIA for awhile, resuming blogging would be the easiest way for those close to me, to keep up with my "goings on". Countless monumental events have happened in the last 8 months. Where do I begin?

Comfort Zone: Looking back at the past (only to acknowledge the present and see the future) Shawn is a sucker for a comfort zone. A little afraid by the unknown and unfamiliar, Shawn goes back to comfort....AKA "easy". Well troops - moving cross country, starting a new career, and finding new friends, is anything but "easy". After doing a little life evaluation, I was surprised to find how many comfort areas I found myself in. Friends, Family, Lovers, Ex-lovers, career. Yeah, I think that's it! LOL A good friend once told me, "Life is like a cirlce, until you break that cirlce, that circle will continue." These are good "circles" - - relationships, on all levels....and bad "circles" - habits, phobias, discomfort zones. So......I broke some and mended some. Not a bad piece of advice from an ethinc (religiously centered) $7.50 and hour secretary, that routed calls and simultaneously ran a "prayer" line from her desk. I miss you Phyllis! Now I have to do all the photocopying myself.

Whew, that went serious in about on sentence...now onto something light that we could talk about at a wake. The weather, just for starters! San Diego, called America's Finest City for a reason. The weather, the water, Tijuana, and the multiple military bases. You people, you can can have your piece of the American Dream! I just want a 50' Wind Jammer boat parked right next to the U.S.S.HUNK(G).....that'll be my American Dream. "Hey Steve, send out the dingy ( and no Walt, that's not your cue) the boys next door look thirsty" LOL

"Abbrevity is key with ADD" -- -life motto and epitaph.

2001-10-25T08:30:00.000-07:00

Testing Testing....Am I here? Am I really here? Will me let "I" know?

2001-08-03T13:22:00.000-07:00

What did Lazuarus have to do with anything?

Like I asked before. How long did Lazuras last before he died (again)? Sorry to fallen off the face of the Earth troops, but Shawn has been busy, lazy, sketchy, fat, thin (maybe a bit of exaggeration), depressed, manic, elated....all in about couple of days (or has it reallt pressed on for weeks now).....it happens that way, you know.
I'm making a mental effort to hit the gym next week (Walt is your job to get me and keep me there)....it's my job to stay awake during the whole thing. Little by little, bit by bit, plans for one of the biggest moves of my life start to into motion. The selling of my house, which I hope we bring a close to before this week, the setting up of interviews, and the apartment search while in San Diego during Labor Day. For the second time in my life, I'm scared of trying something new. It's a big world out there.....and I'm about to dive head first into just a small tiny portion and, again, call it home. Next!

2001-07-13T06:03:00.000-07:00

"Up from the grave he arose........"

Trivia question boy and girls: Just how long did Lazuarus live after coming back to life? From the gospel it reads that he lived a "long and prosperous life". However, we also know what the life exp. was back then, too. My point. Was it worth it? Would he have "been better off dead".....no sacrilige (ms)......just a question? What was the purpose in reviving him? He had a disease (if memory serves me correct) - - did it simply vanish when he came back to walk amongst the mortals? Did he hold the answer to the $64, 000 question? Did he know where the missing (bloodied) glove had been thrown in a recent domestic dispute? Questions that go through a mind......that shouldn't.

2001-06-05T11:54:00.000-07:00

blogging for the aurally impaired?

aural or audial? I couldn't make up my mind. Nothing pleases me more than to pop in an old CD ,that hasn't filled my ears with joy, in a couple of months. To no avail, "down on all fours" always does the trick...so to speak. The cover: a muscular tanned rear end with two massive hands placed at either side of the hip...indicating...well, you be the one with filthy mind. Marketed to the masses, no. Niche marketing at it's best, absolutely. "ring my bell" - flawless remix!!!!!!!!!

Slow day at work. 4 scoops of tuna fish on greek salad from Mel's - an "American" diner owned and operated by the lovely vietnemese people...who unlike the Indians (dot, not woo woo)...don't unscrew everyother light bulb and close the restrooms. Go MEL's! FYI: Creative Loafing did (one year...long long long ago) rate them to have the tastiest philly cheese steaks in the city. My question: Who the fuck was looking for culinary delights on Fulton Industrial in the first place? Hmm..make's a man wonder / wander.

Thoughts for the day: Kudzu as an ornamental (but very fast) seasonal vine. Will I ever get a pool in my backyard before I'm 30? Webster...define....relationship as it applies to the 2001 styel of living. Is a Snicker's bar considered a "nutritional" candy bar...kind of an oxy"moron". Done, no more thoughts! It's easy when your shallow.

2001-06-04T08:48:00.000-07:00

to blog or not to blog.....is that a question?

today is monday. the day after sunday and usually the day before tuesday. i'm at odd place in my morning. at such a peaceful place, it scares me (these spells usually don't last the long...dammnit) i've drawn a close to the hectic scheduling of my weekend events - which went without a hitch and were flawless...to say the very least. To the Biltmore Forrest County Club...thank you for your flexibility and for the year's supply of your monogrammed berverage napkins. I love souvenirs like that. To the bride and groom.....have a happy life! Oh, and thank you too, for the year supply of YOUR monogrammed beverage napkins...I'm sure they will be the topic of every conversation at my next 30 cocktail functions. Kudos...and forget to have a happy life. XOXOXO

My roomie and I indulged ourselves in a very formal converation upon my arrival yesterday (during the fucking awsome lighting storm.......I could only think of sex with weather like that..sorry!). He quietly informed me that he would be moving out July 1st. My bitching about this ceases. He has been a good friend to me and for that I am grateful. He has been a wonderful surrogate father to Sandee, and for that I am grateful. Brian, I wish you all the best with your new living situation.

NOTE TO SELF: OLDER JEWISH A-LIST WOMAN AND YOUNGER A-LIST GAY MAN DO NOT SEE THE SAME MOVIES. Sorry Babs....Bridget Jones's (boring) diary did nothing for me. Lessons learned from her: smoke less, drink less, exercise regularly. Hell, could we not have had that sort of plot from a Suzanne Powder infomercial????? I must say, though. My date was the hottest thing since sliced bread. Glad to be home, boy!

2001-05-30T07:43:00.000-07:00

Sunset

What is my fascination with Beth Orton these days? These soulful lyrics ring through my head like the pots and pan remixes of Backstreet, only hours after I've exited the dancefloor. The same line "today, is whatever you want it to be", must be this reoccurring soon to be mantra, for me. A sort of take control, f*ck fate, sort of apporach to realist thinking. I never really subscribed to that sort of sit back and let fate take its course reasoning. So passive! So unattractive! Note to self: Passive=YAWN......matter of fact BIG YAWN. I may be labeled as a bit pushy and agressive (by only my closest friends), but you will always know where you stand with me...... and DEFINITELY what my likes and dislikes are. Ooooops. ended sentence incorrectly.......where is my grammar at?

I so need to get to the gym today! I'm beginning to look like some haggard old piece of a circuit boy remnant. (wait, I am) Got Sleep? Biceps and shoulders - main focus......canteloupe shoulders.....YUM, even on me. Next in line....abs. Before July - - I will have abs. I know somewhere down there, they're just screaming to see the light of day....maybe not all six....but at least 4? Come on genetics, throw me a bone. Cardio must start consisting of more than 8 hours of grinding away to music that twin remixes in his head. Boy, you're going to be a fierce DJ (or black Dj with dreds) one day. But, until then.......we'll sing to each other. Makeout session anyone?

Low maintenance to no maintenance: The apple of my eye

There are those times when you approach conversation unsure of the right things to say. Or even if there's anything right to say. (by the way....I hate the word right. It should only be used when referring to the opposite of left. Otherwise, it implies wrong. I much prefer the word correct. You are correct, in lieu of "you are right", meaning......I am wrong...or vice versa.) May I suggest, when heading towards one of these conversation.......you take your conversation to the park. Right around, let's say 7:45 or so. The peacefulness of the late spring sunset descending into our beautiful midtown skyline......will in some way....make all the correct things come to mind. In such fluid thought. The sun setting=the ending of day. The ambient cosmic light above= the beginning of night. Cheers, to new beginnings.

2001-05-23T08:06:00.000-07:00

DETAILS
: a part of a whole, a small subordinate part, a part considered or requriring to be considered seperately from the whole thing.

There are those times in my life where I lose sight of the big picture and find myself fighting a losing battle trying feverishly to keep all the "little" things in order. I would try and "fix" certain attributes about the people I would become involved with, hoping to change them, making them somewhat of a clone from someone in my past. A "cut and paste" approach to relationships, I guess. After existing this way for the greater part of 27 years, I swore off "sweating the little things and fixing people", back in January. Because the ADD condition in which I think, it's almost painful to sit and fully direct my attention on one specific thought, space, idea, relationship for extended periods......the big picture, if you will. I would often opt to run around in a spastic state eyeballing the "details" of the big piture, rather than focussing on the issue at hand. I sit here (kind of mellow and a bit reflective) and silently exhale a stale breath of relief. For the first time, there are no "issues" at hand. I don't have a project to "fix" or someone to "change."

The big picture, happiness......love, trust, and honesty.......everything else, just a detail.

Life simplified.

2001-05-22T08:25:00.000-07:00

Got Sleep?
After much deliberation, I have decided to make t-shirts / tank tops / wife beaters for my closest and dearest friends for gay pride. The slogan..."got sleep", inspired by the milk-lipped star studded ads that appeared in the late ad campaigns of 1999, is only appropriate if you know them as well as I do.

The weekend was long...very fun...but long. Rain kept all fun pool parties at bay.

Note to self: New part-time job has potential to be lots of fun. I think it should only be a matter of time before we can start hosting art shows, having private functions with only attractive customers, and I learn to DJ. Hmm..... poverty may not be so bad.

"Model" friend IM's me this morning to express his disinterest for having to play "Superman" (role play) for a "client". Too much info!